On My Toes Again

It was the start of the third and last week of my holidays. Realising it coupled with the constant nagging from my mum day in day out, I decided to make myself useful by cleaning up the boxes of stuff which I had brought back some 2 weeks ago which had remain untouched ever since. I rummage thorugh my stuff, sorting things necessary to bring back to my new room in campus and leaving stuff that I didnt need at home. As I packed, I realised the amount of paper that I could use as rough paper which amounted to almost a rim of paper. Guess, we never realise how much paper we waste individually. Imagine everyone of us. Will there be any trees left in the future? Recycle seem like a good option to start with.

Mood Swings

I realise today that man seem to be the more emotional gender compared to woman. The idea just pop in my head as I realised that I was beginning to act a little moody. It could be due to checking my results today, knowing that I nowhere improving my grades. Guess, its another bad news that my parents would be unpleased to hear. I never could wonder why I can never do well in exams although trying hard for them. Could it be my lack of focus? Getting myself involve in CF activities so much that my parents seem to take it as a reason of my failure to well? I have been passing exams but never been able to score them much. It is pretty discouraging at times to see others succeed in it when I do not. I realise that I was not the only one suffering from such a dilemma but also my fellow CF people who seem to be going through as well. Is it a curse I wonder? Why are CF people suffering from such a dilemma? The thought just ponder and I realise that it is something that we must be praying for. Maybe that is one of the factors that is bringing the CF at a standstill and having problems with attendance and people worrying about their studies and not able to commit. All the more we need to pray and pray that we be able to go through it all with continous determination, strength and faith. After numerous days having not gone online, I was connected once again to the cyber world. I message a friend of mine to come online to discuss on things we needed to do when we return back to campus. And I guess I felt kind of uncomfortable with the whole conversation as I felt it different and not as exciting as it used to be. I wonder why. Could it be that my results had cause the change in mood? Or was I going through the phase where some consider as the "Male PMS". I can agree on that i have my mood swings once in a while. And i recollected the IMU people mentioning that guys do suffer from PMS due to the hormones inbalance. It came to my knowledge of how to maintain a constant attitude all the time. Well, I could blame it on biological reasons for my mood swings but I guess that isn't the appropriate thing to do. I sometimes think to much and at times confusing myself all together that I began to develops a low self-esteem that make me feel so unworthy. Guess, growing up with parents who seem to worry alot has grown into me. I feel the pressure all the time when I am at home. Sometimes i do wish I was already out working and living my own life away from my parents nagging and constant worries. Guess, thats a part and parcel in life and sometimes we do get agitated once in a while but it is important that we realise how to deal with the situation in the best way and maintaining a positive attitude in it. Guess, thats where God comes into the picture and thats when we reflect and ask ourselves, What would Jesus do?

Incomplete Post

Most of my posting would be incomplete as I would be leaving out some pictures until next week due to slow connection of uploading. So, a more colourful setting would be revealed next week.

Meet Joe Black

With a tiring day before me, I couldn't help but to sleep for a mere 10 hours only to wake up around 11am the following day. Didn't really do much except mainly to sit at home watching TV, reading newspaper and lazying around. However, I manage to catch hold of a show called "Meet Joe Black" played by Brad Pit, Claire Forlani and Anthony Hopkins. It was a very interesting story where they brought the idea of the "Death" coming in the form of a human and learning to adapt to the things around him and also handling his emotion when he began to discover what love is. I couldn't help at the moment to question what love is as well. At the same time, the setting cause me to think about her as well. I kind of missed her at the point but realise that I had to get a grip on my emotions and feelings, not letting it wander to far that I find myself lost in it and going through a struggle with emotions if I let it take control of me. I prayed that He will teach me to guard my emotions and at the same time prayed that He will show me His way.

Fruitful Saturday

Eventhough it was kind of a monotous day, I decided to make an attempt to wake up early the next morning for a jog. Finally, after much trying, I finally woke up and with that went with my dad and sis to the beautiful Lake Garden. We reached there pretty late, around 7.30 am. Guess, u must be wondering why I considered late. It was because the number on the road adjacent to the Lake Garden were beginning to build up and instantly replacing the cool and fresh air to smog. With that aside, I manage to venture around the Lake Gardens taking a full circle and stopping at the little shed for 20 sit-ups and 10 push-ups. It did good to the protruding tummy but it was shortlived momentarily by a sumptious breakfast at a nearby mamak of a tosei, capati and puri that was accompanied by a plate of mutton, vadei and a cup of tea. Fast it went, fast it came back. One of the most interesting that I came across while on my run was to spot a group of senior citizen filling the air with melodies of good Chinese oldies on their harmonica. It was seemingly an interesting presentation who gather frequently. My dad was telling my sis and I that it was common to see such antics in China where parks in the early morning are filled with people demonstrating tai chi or coming together for fan dance or a musical presentation. It was a rare sight in Malaysia and could be consider a soon to be lost facet of our life. Lifestyle have change tremendously for the past years. Cultures and activities such as things have began to be a thing of the past. The young generation are normally up late in the wee hours of the night spending time at clubs or mamaks only to awake in the mid of the day just in time for lunch. Half a day is gone and sometimes very little achieve and no wonder the day passes by so quickly. It would interesting to see young people arise early in the morning going for a jog and participating healthy activities such as this. It would be even more harmonious if the different races can gather in one place doing a similar activity. It such a shame to see the division. Though many have said that Malaysia maybe a multi-racial country but the division are obvious. My morning encounter saw the Chinese playing the harmonica and the Malays having their own aerobics near the state library. It would be a good idea to gather people, probably with a few music instrument and just play a song or two to entertain the crowd that seem to gather for their daily exercise. I could envisioned the Lake Garden as a place filled with street performers. What a wonderful it will be though on one hand it could be a mere distraction rather than entertainment to a handful.

Awaiting the New Drum Set

I was called upon last week by Paul to be on the drums this week although it was Pastor Phil Stevenson from Perth, Australia would be ministering to us this week. It has always been a joy to be on the rickety drum set in my church. Having been around for almost 10 years, it was beginning to give way with various part coming out, most of the time due to shifting. However, it still gave a relatively good sound and it complemented in me accustomising myself to provide the best beat and sounds for praise and worship.The thing that made me glee with happiness is that we would be changing a new set of drums soon. Its always good news for a drummer to know that we have a new set to get our hands on. At first, we was going to purchase a 5 piece Pearl set for the price of RM6k. However, the recent news is that Pastor Ben manage to negotiate with another music company in Damansara to purchase a 6 piece Master Pearl set drums which is suited for studio recording. The news blew me away. And not only that, we were below the budget of RM7k and had extra cash to add on in purchasing symbols which would bring to a total of RM10k for the new set. Furthermore, we would be getting it in a months time. Boy, is this good news or what. During practice, we had Mary Gentleman, one of the people who came with Pastor Phil coming in as a backup vocal. Although she had a back sorethroat, probably due to the excellant food our land had to offer, we made sure she didn't feel out of place and assure her that everything would be okay. Quite a tall and good looking blonde I would say and she is a year younger than me but alot more matured looking than me.

Finishing The Race

It has been quite a long time since I step into Aspirers, the youths of my church. I used to serve as a leader but decided to take a leave from it as it was beginning to occupy my weekends and causing me to spend less time with my family. Besides that, I decided to commit to CF back in campus and focus only in the Music Department in church. The main reason I came was because Pastor Phil and team would be ministering that night. It was good to see him again after his last visit here 3 years ago. A very nice pastor who spoke wisdom. I wouldnt think that he would recognise me but I don't blame him as he must have seen so many people to remember them all. That night preaching wasn't done by Pastor Phil but a guy by the name of Josh, who was part of the team that came 3 years ago. He was the first guy who approached me when I entered and he still look the the same charming guy that girls would go ga-ga over. It was surprising that this engineering student had gone into full-time and was now the youth pastor of the church. The then shy guy had grown up to be a very outspoken and exciting person. Amidst his charismatic behaviour, I realise he was an introvert and a thinker as well. However, this did not detered him from giving a strong sermon on "Finishing the Race". One of the point that he made that stood out to me was his sharing about completing his degree although he had this burden midway to his course to go into full-time. He said that his flesh wanted to go into full-time but his spirit made him stay in uni. It was a tough decision to make but he felt that God wanted him to finish what he came to do first before he decided to go into full-time. It really spoke to me and the people I knew who decided to quit halfway came into picture. The picture of fellow committees in the CF for the past years who decided to leave the committee halfway due to God's calling. It was rather strange for me and I sometimes doubt whether is it really God's calling to them. Personally, I have a thing about people quitting halfway. To them it may seem a calling, to me it would seem to be leaving a responsibility behind, a responsibility that was agreed upon in the very beginning that has not met its completion in the end and resulted in others around having facing the consequences of such decision. I realise that many people, speaking to myself as well, seem to loose our focus so easily that we loose sight of finishing the race that we started. We give up half way, thinking that we can start again somewhere else which we think is the best option at that time. Even if it is God's calling, I guess the lesson I learn is to finish what we have started before continuing on another journey God has plan for us. I wouldnt believe that God has ask us to take an immediate decision even after calling us but we should be wise and responsible to settle what we have started peacefully for the benefit of all and not self. Besides Josh, there was also Mike and 2 other girls who came along. One of them was a surprising 14 year old who look so much older than her age and pretty as well. Guess, the angmo's seem to look much more older than their age compared to their Asian counterparts.

A Session With the Future Doctors

After the meeting, I had the priviledge to meet up with a few IMU students who have frequent the church I attend for a good few months, whom I had not the priviledge to get to know. One of the reason of this disadvantage is being up on stage serving and not able to meet them after coming down from the stage as most of them would already be gone by then. I decided to take this oppurtunity to get to know them by going out for supper with them at S2. It was good to hear that they are feel alot at home even after a few month having attending cell and also participating in the recent Easter musical. Besides that, I had the priviledge of meeting Steven, the ex-president of IMU Bukit Jalil CF, Marilyn and also 2 other girls whom I now forgot their names though I know they begin with "Y". I have a bad memory of chinese names but was better at remembering faces. It was a interesting that our conversation for the night was a tale of medical discussion as we began to talk about menopause and PMS. It all started when I got mix up between the two of them. I would have thought that PMS was the one in the later stage which I was wrong and the whole debate began to start. Me, Esther and Daniel were the only non-medical student there. It seem that Daniel had a good understanding of this terms which some of them I had no idea of but his mistake when he got mix up with flush and menopause. Other than that, we even talked about eating vegetables that would help the gut in collecting water for disposal or generally called shit. It was all in the good name of laugh and we truly enjoyed it. During the whole conversation, I was kind of shy on one area. That is mentioning the word God and Jesus. I realise that most of the jokes that they made were somewhat "Christian" in some sense. I would normally shy away from it or not being comfortable with mentioning God's name. Guess, I haven't had the confidence enough to mention His name let alone in public or even to my friends. The thought ponder as I reflect on the sermon that was spoken earlier by Josh. He mentioned about having a personal relationship with Him. At that instance, I realised what being a Christian was all about. I always had the thought that being Christ-like seem to sum it all up. But, I think I neglected the part of having a personal relationship with Him. I questioned myself about it and I admit that I dare not say that I truly have a personal relationship with Him as I do not keep a constant walk with Him. I realised that I pray at different times of the days, sometimes when I am free or when the need arises. I do not make it a point to do it as a routine. Though I disagree in making it personal rather than a routine, but i realised that routine helps makes it personal. An area which still need alot of discipline.

Gracious Father

Sunday was here and had to quickly wake up to be at church early as I was serving. My parents and sister were busy packing things in the car as my sis had to go to Malacca to register into MMU for her orientation week. After months of lazying around at home, she will finally be off to uni. While she is there, I hope that she be able to get some scholarships which has applied to further her studies. My sis has seemingly no idea what to do and it would be a wise decision to apply everywhere and choose the best option available to her. Probably, admitting her to MMU would be an exposure for her to choose her profession, hopefully. At church, Pastor Phil delivered the message. It was about learning to "Live An Intimate Life with Him". His testimony of how he went through the pit and the grace of God that brought him out from that touched me. He was involved in a car accident about few year ago in which he ran a red light unknowingly. This resulted in one of kids that he was bringing back home from church died. He was the only child of the family. It was God's grace that brought the mother to forgving him although he knew he deserved to be rediculed for being careless and killing her song. He had an encounter with Him. Its hard to imagine living with the though that you had unintentionally killed someone due to your negligence but the love of God is so much greater and He is there always to save us especially in the darkest pit of our life as long as we humble ourselve and call unto Him. As my parents were away and looking for people to have lunch, I was out again with the IMU people, thanks to Shiau Yen. We made our way to the Seremban Market where the famous beef noodle stall is located. I decided to have mixed rice instead of beef noodle but made an exception for a small bowl of beef ball. As the weather was really hot, we headed to the nearest chendol stall and indulge ourselve in the cool and extremely sweet dessert.

Easter Musical Appreciation Dinner

After a mere few hours, I was back in church again. This time was the Easter Musical appreciation dinner. I was kind of surprise to be invited as I only played for only Good Friday as I had to be back in KL for committee meeting. There weren't many people around as many had gone back to KL or much food served as well. After dinner, we made our way to the sanctuary where we previewed the VCD of the musical. It was mainly for the benefit of those who were involved who didn't have the chance to see themselve in it. It was kind of funny to hear background noises of baby crying and talking and at the same time seeing the people around me responding to their action on screen. It was nice to see it again and also it was nice to realise know I was blessed to be in this church. The amount of preparation and effort to put up a play of this magnitude was simply God blessing. I realised that our church was blessed to have so many talented and participating people who always lend a helping when needed. My thoughts began to reflect back the time when I had thought of moving to another new church. One of the main reason was I realise that I couldn't really grow in my church. This was because of having been to other church where the preachers were alot more dynamic and the congregration was more happening. It was merely satisfying my wants that led me to contribute less. I realise that I shouldn't expect the church to give me but to give to the church. This though had been lingering in me for the pass weeks as topics of giving instead of receiving seem to speak out more. I kind of realise that I am never contented with what I have until I realise it which sometimes can be abit too late. Guess, the grass is always greener on the other isnt really true after all. We tend to see ahead but close out eyes to the things in front of us not knowing that it is good as well. Other than that, I was approached by Jenny at the dinner about writing scripts that were based on sermons being preached in church. I had written a script for Christmas last year which we didnt manage to present it due to my late submission of it. I was glad to hear that the Drama Team would be using the script this coming Christmas though I did mention that I could gather some ideas for another one as well. Can it be that my sudden crave for writing would lead me in beginning to wrtie scripts for plays that would be used in church? I really do not know although I had though of starting to indulge in having a hobby of gathering ideas for drama, dance or a film which would be used to spread the Word. It is a very interesting thought but thought would remain thoughts unless action is taken upon it. I hope to begin slowly and probably start with writing short sketches during my free time. One way of not wasting my time aimlessly.

A Title Won Without Splendour

I came back after church wanting to watch the match against my favourite Arsenal with Spurs. It was the London derby. A crucial match to see as Chelsea had just lost the match against Newcastle earlier and all that Arsenal need is a draw to clinch the Premiership title. It started off pretty well in the first half with goals coming from the captain Vierra and later my Pires, which was exceuted in a fashionable way with skills in the passing of the ball and precision in finishing it. Having 2 goals at hand in the first half cause Arsenal to display a poor second half. Pride had settled in. There wasn't a display of superiority at all. They kept loosing the ball and played around in front the goals which saw a whole load of chances wasted. My dad was pretty upset with the game and was not surprised that complacency would rob them of a win. And it was surprising true when 2 goals were let in, one by superb drive by Redknapp and a stupid penalty given by the emotional Lehmann, who should be given the boot. Though a draw was enough to seal a victory, it lack supremecy and Arsenal had allowed complacency and pride to set it that ended the game without any flair. Guess, pride is men worse enemy of defeat.

A Trip To KL

Mom had wanted to go down to KL the next day and as the only person besides my Dad who would normally take our family down to KL, I was given the task to do just that. Besides that, my younger sis were planning with some of her friends who were either on holidays or waiting for their intake into colleges or form 6, to visit friends down at the college heaven of Subang. She had a big group of friends down at Taylors doing a variety of Pre-U courses as they prepared to move into other colleges or university for their choice of profession, mainly medicine. I remembered my days at Taylors when I was there studying SAM for 4 months before heading of to MMU. It was one of the best time of my years and a short one too as I was firstly expose with people from different places, coming together in one place to study. It was a culture shock in someways to see people dress up casually to college, some modest while other had a flair to show off everything. It was some sort of a fashion parade, something Taylors was famous of. Pretty girls and cute hunks. What I missed most in Taylors was dressing in a simple T-shirts, shorts and slippers to classes. Simple too casual but thats Taylors. Freedom to do about anything.

As I dropped my sisters and friends at Taylors, it was pretty interesting to see her and her group of friends. Imagine having a group of friends or should i say gang amounting to more than 10 people where most of them have known each others for such a long time. I do see the comparison between me and her or should i say the comparison between girls and guys. I could see that girls are more closer with one another compared to guys and seen friendship as something very important. I do have friends which I have known for quite some time but at times I do questioned the closeness or bond we have with one another. Most of the time we hang out, mainly crapping and really never really knowing one another in a more deeper way. This is one of the difference I noticed between guys and girls where guys are more laid back while girls are more personal when it comes to conversation. It may not be true but this is something I personally took notice of.

A Visit At Grandma's

Leaving my sis behind, me and my mum headed down to the area of Mont' Kiara. What am I doing in a posh place like this? Well, I am off to visit my grandma who stays at one of the apartments there. It's been some time since I visited. Guess, it was during Chinese New Year I guess. When I reached there, I realised that her place had a power failure and there was no electricity in the house. It was quite a good timing to visit her as well as we bought some food over for her to eat. If not, she be probably looking for things to eat around the house. Besides having no electricity, there was no gas as well as the gas supply was somehow tied up with the electricity supply. There, I had manage to catch a glimpse of the Chinese daily that were placed in her living room. Though, I had no ideas what those characters meant, I have always enjoyed seeing pictures as Chinese daily always presented a very pictureque report on a certain event.

Death Is Uncertain

One event which caught my attention was the recent gunning down of a businessman in Seremban. I heard about it through my dad the day before. This businessman was quite famous in Seremban having a string of restaurant to his name which comprise of Meng Kee, a food court in Temiang and a new restaurant near the site of the new Terminal 2. He was also one of the shareholders of on of the most famous restaurant in Seremban, Regent. He was apparently back after closing one of his restaurant in the early hour s of the morning and had just came out of his car in front of his car when he was approached by two man. After a brief confrontation, an argument broke out and they drew their semi-automatic pistol and was gunned down 5 times, 4 in the body and 1 in the head. His wife, who was asleep in the master bedroom heard the loud shots outside her house and went to window to see what was going on. She was shocked to see a car driving off and her husband slummed to the ground. At that moment, she and her daughter was in the house and they called for help from the hospital who brought him to the hospital. Unfortunately, after a brief operation to remove the bullets in his body, he succumbed to his injuries and pass on. The motive of the killing was uncertain and there were many speculation surrounding his death due to his business. Apparently, the incident took place at Taman Punca Emas which was about 4 minutes drive from my house. Another discovery I made was that the wife was related to the mother of one of my friends, who apparently stayed opposite the road leading to my area after seeing her in the picture in the newspapers. Then, it all fitted in why the lady, the deceased and the car look so familiar. I had seen them before. The lady was a constant visitor to my friend's house as I recognise the old green Mitsubishi. I am kind of acquinted with her two songs who used to be in my school last time. I kind of feel sorry for them and also for my friend's family due to the sudden lost. This shows how life is so fragile as one minute they may right beside you and the next, who knows.

A Kid Once More

After leaving my grandma's place and that we were in the vicinity of Sri Hartamas, my mom and I decided to pay a visit to my uncle's kindergarden. I had never been to his new kindergarden before or let alone his new house after shifting from the family home at Jalan Gasing. As I arrived there, the place seems pretty simple or should i say a dull shade of green. There was no fancy colourful signboards outside, something which is common to kindergarden. I had a priviledge to meet with one of the kids parents who happened to stop by to pick up her kid. She was a Japanese. What was more surprising is that I found out that my uncle's kindergarden had 8 Japanese children and I was priviledge to meet the first Japanese kid that came to this kindergarden. Being in an area where expatriates resides, it was a common sight to see foreigners living in that area. I kind of smiled to myself when I realised that she was driving a Proton Waja and that time I was driving my dad's Toyota Altis. Seems like we are swapping roles alltogether as I always thought Japanese would normally support things from their own country. Probably, being in a country long enough, we tend to asimilate to the culture and lifestyle. I would have thought initially that she would be a Malaysian as well considering her the way she carries herself. Well, after greeting both my aunt and uncle, i headed into the house to meet with three other kids who were still there. I had the oppurtunity to meet with 2 Japanese boy and a a chinese girl whose big eyes seem to have caught my attention. Being around small kids always made me transform to a small kid myself. I began doing funny faces and trying to get the attention of the keys by being one of them, playful. The ploy did work as one of the Japanese boy, Yuki began running around me and began to play catch the ball with me. He had just taken a bath and was already drench with sweat. The other two kids were more quiet in nature but their cute faces were so irresitable that I had to pay a little attention to her. I have been fond of kids from an early stage. My uncle who were childless considered having this kindergarden a blessing in disguise as they have the priviledge now to be around kids and at the same time generate income through it. I wouldn't mind starting a kindergarden where the joy of bringing up young kids and nuturing them to be better citizens of the country would be rewarded when we see them succeed later in life.

1 U

Thereafter I headed down to 1 Utama. It had been my second to this huge complexes, some say had outbeaten the likes of KLCC due to its designers shops and Mid Valley due to its floor space. I kind of like the setting of the 1U all together due to its variety of shops and boutiques that seem to strike out as something that interesting and creative. My mum and I split ways as we had different interest and it would be strange to tail her all the way, something which both of us do not like. I made my way walking around alone going from one to another, one wing to the next. It was nice observing people along the way, couples walking hand in hand, family bringing their kids around, foreigners paying a visit to this new place of interest. I didn't buy anything but had the priviledge of window shopping, something which I do often as there werent any interesting to purchase let alone any sale that would cause a further interest. The crowd wasn't that big as it was a weekday which felt pretty good as I dislike crowded areas. I guess out of the shops that caught my attention, food outlets seem to top the list. The decos and interiors seem to cause me to have ideas up my sleeve once again identifying areas which would help build my dream restaurant. I am not sure why food and beverage me but maybe having family members in the business cause that interest to come forth, my aunt have a western American restaurant called Ede's Cookshack at Taipan and my uncle owns a joint that have franchises here and in Singapore called Fish & Co. Besides that, having a grandma who is an excellant and also me having a huge appetitie for food, its no wonder that my interest seems to lie with anything that has something to do with filling up the stomach. Like some may say, "A Man's Happiness is determined by the Pot of his Belly." It's already showing but I hope it doesn't grow any bigger let alone qualify me to be the next Santa in the making.

I was off then to Subang once again to pick up my sis and her friends from Sunway where the were there hanging out with her friends. I made my way to KL city giving a try to new Pantai Expressway after hearing a big crawl at Federal Highway. Althought the toll was a killing RM3.20, I was impress by the it all as it carried me all the way from Sunway to Bangsar before heading on to the City Centre. The elevated bypass all the traffic and reached the city at about a surprising 10-15 minutes before I was obstructed by the jam in the city itself. Its a common sight to be caught in the jam. I had no idea which road to take as I wasnt really familiar with the roads though I had been through roads that lead me to Dataran Merdeka. Thanks to my mum, who happened to be a KL girl, she guided me through it all and at the same time recounting her good old days, pointing to buildings she used to work at to the fellow passengers in my car. They were quite surprise to see KL so happening as we pass by the club strip which comprise of Beach Club and Atmosphere before reaching to the vicinitiy of KLCC. While in the jam, I manage to waste no effort to take a few snapshots of the beautiful city skyline, one hand on the wheel and the other on my Olympus. I reached Phileo Business Centre where my uncle office is at. It was good to see him once again, though he had just finish a meeting about few minutes before I arrive. I noticed that he had a new pair of glasses and was looking cheerful seeing me and my sis while the my mum and her friends waited in the car. I made my way back home thereafter after dinner at the old Paul Street and fetching the "gang" to their respective homes. Dead tired, I stay awake just to catch the last episode of Latte @ 8.

Latte @ 8

I had the priviledge to view out very own Malaysian Talk Show on my current favourite channel, 8TV which was hosted by the super expressive and funny guy Jason Lo from the fame Evening News. After a few episodes, I was pretty satisfied by the way it was conducted although there were many rooms of improvement to be made especially the venue and the way it was conducted. Airing live over at Starbucks Sunway Pyramid, there was quite a huge following to it considering the crowd there. I was quite impressed by the jokes that was presented though most of it was funny, thank goodness and the people that were interviewd was interesting as well. On lineup for the Wednesday show was pretty better than the one on Thursdays though it was the last episode. It featured Sarimah Ibrahim, Too Phat, Butterfingers and Joanne Kam Po Po. It was really funny especially when there were many subtle corny jokes coupled with Jason Lo exagerated expression that cause a giggle or two.

A Crush On Marion

After constantly viewing 8TV recently, I have to admit that I have a crush on the host of 8TV Quickie, Marion. I can't deny to say that it has motivated me in watching when the time Quickie is on hoping that she is there. I admired mainly the way she carry herself. She is so very cool, striking me as a girl who is outgoing and confident especially when doing the show. Her small eyes, cute face, adoring dimples and an irrestible smile have really got my attention. Besides that, I really like her style of dressing and her funky short messy hairdo which seem to be a trademark for her. I felt that her chemistry as a presenter with her co-host Adam seems to be the best ever though she had been with Jien of the Disney Club Malaysia fame and Rina, the ex-member of Intoxicated. I hope to meet her one day as I would think she would make a very nice person to talk to let alone crap too. Other than that, I realise that although my usual fascination with girls with big eyes have taken a different perspective all together as I have began take a liking for small eyes girls as well. I guess the sweet demeanour petite have began to interest me. But putting aside all the physical aspect of a girl, I realise the one thing that tops my liking would be CHARACTER. The way she carries herself with confidence, strong, fun and most of all, cool. No wonder I tend to take a liking to girls who seem to resonate a tom-boyish kind of style. I wonder whether the female part of me of being 84% of the other sex which was resulted from a survey, has taken a toll on me.

I have come to realise that I am already in the middle of my holidays. In 1 and half weeks time, this joy of doing absolutely nothing will be gone as term starts. Its quite incredible to going through my uni life with a long vacation of onli 3 weeks. Though it is comparatively much less compared to other colleges or uni, I have learn to accept it and feel kind of happy to have 3 weeks rather than 3 months of holidays. Imagine lazing around for 3 months. That be simply a waste of time. Having short holidays allow me to enjoy them. Longer holiday would require me or be required by my parents to get a job to pass time and at the same moment to earn some money. All in all, I felt that I have indeed enjoyed my holidays which mainly comprises of spending a huge amount of time resting. Sleeping for almost 9 to 10 hours everyday feels extremely good. However, noticing the ever expanding belly of mine from eating and probably sleeping add some guilt to it all the more.

Back On Track

After numerous attempt to wake up early in the morning to get into my my shirt, shorts and shoes, I finally made that attempt a reality on Wednesday. I was stepping onto the track after a time of absence. It was good to finally be on feet once again trailing down the planned partways that would allow me and other fellow health conscious fellow Serembanians to loose some fats. I had the priviledge to step foot for the very first time on my town newly refurbished Lake Gardens. It took about few months to reshaped the landscape and to add some lights to brighten up the place during the night which was a project that was UPM was asked to attend to. I would say it was a job well done as it was a project done by students. I apparently reached the place quite late, around 7pm as I was at Terry's Crib discussing on our Final Year Project Title and at the same time onlining on his impressively fast connection of Streamyx. It was indeed so much faster that the usual dial-up which I had been going on lately while at home. Kind of reminded me of hostel which makes me anticipate my arrival back in campus where I have full connection to the net. As an MMU student, life without the Net can be burden for many as most of the time we are constantly connected. Anyway, when I reached Seremban Lake Garden, there were still many people going around on their daily walks and jogs. Some were in little sheds doing sit-ups while some found their little cosy area to do some push-up. It kind of motivated me in leading a more active life and this has helped me push for about 1 and half rounds around the Lake Garden. Lost of stamina due to neglect have resulted in me panting heavily and feeling my muscle ache in different areas. I do hope I would continue this, if the weather terries in the evening and that I have motivation to wake up in the early morning. It was a nice sight as I began to walk around the whole garden. Felt kind of proud of having a jewel in Seremban which I can be proud of. Everything seems new and pleasant to the eyes. Hope that it would remain in this condition and that the management will be able to maintain its beauty and serenity of our beloved Seremban Lake Gardens. I also had a chance to gather my thoughts and talk to Him, something which I love doing as I go for a walk to cool down after a run.

The Joy Of Writing

As I began to spend time during this holidays to account of what I have gone through the day and also to jot down my thoughts, I realised that I am beginning to enjoy sitting down on my old faithful laptop typing it all out on Word Pad and posting it up on my blog when I get online. It seems like I finally found a way to express myself freely whether it be things that I am struggling with or thoughts that come to my mind that seem to intrigue me. Many people have different forms of expressing themselves. Some may prefer to call up a friend and pour out their heart out to that friends, others may indulge in different forms of activities like painting, singing or chatting as a form of expression. I found out recently that writing seem to suit me more. It was really surprising when I found out how comfortable it feels to just sit down and write down my thoughts of the day. Besides writing, I have also tried other ways such as sitting down with a friend to talk or maybe singing as a form of expression of myself but I realise that I have never been able to express myself fully. What I want to express seem to be limited due to certain distraction that may come my way. So, I am pretty happy to finally found something that I am comfortable of doing and hope to pursue writing as one way of expressing myself and at the same time experiment with other modes of expression which may allow me to express myself more. I had a thought last time to maybe write a book one day since I am beginning to enjoy writing now. What will I write about? I really do not know. However, I hope to write something that is practical and that is able to help people in collecting their thoughts together. Fictions may come to me as something creative in expressing my thoughts in a more interesting way but it all boils down to what I want to write about and the message I want to bring across to the people who read my writing.

Besides that, I hope that by writing it will help me gather my thoughts in order so that I will be able to deliver them precisely without loosing focus of the topic of discussion and also to train myself to think before I speak.At the same time, I would like to make sure I use the propers words and diction when speaking. I hope that this would be one way to train me to be confident in front of people and to deliver the necessary message to the specific group of people. I guess in order to be confident speaking in front of people, one of the first thing to do is to gather your thoughts. And I realise one way of doing this is to sit down and write down what you want to say first before saying it. I need to make sure that I say the right things and not be carried away by other factors such as emotion and make sure I address the issue rather than the person involve. This is something I realise when politicians make an important speech. They always prepare a transcript before delivering their message. It is not a spur of a moment kind of things or something spontaneous. Though I sometimes disagree with the method of delivery of the speech but i agree that preparation need to be made before delivering an important message. Just like politicians, preachers does the same as well. Its difficult to be spontaneous because you may tend to run off the topic. At the same time, I also believe that the Holy Spirit has the tendency of leading us into speaking about another thing. However, that doesnt mean we should not be prepared. Well, its funny that while writing this thoughts, I find myself running away from what I wanted to speak at first. It started by writing to speaking about Holy Spirit guiding. Guess, our thoughts may even wonder when we write and I am a living proof to this. It seems that I really writing our my wondering thoughts and not making a statement which seem to show the tendency of how far thoughts can really go. Pretty interesting discovery as I write this. It feels like I tend to loose my focus quite easily. Something that I need to work on.

An Interesting Reading Session In The Daily Today

As I turned the pages on Session Two in The Star today, I found myself practically glued to most of the articles that were printed on it. It was simply interesting to read them all and gathered alot of interesting details about different things in life. Here are some of the feature article of the day and my thoughts on it;

Hypnotheraphy

It was a feature article of the day as it was on the front page of Session Two. The article was about helping people overcome their bad habits through hypnotism. Hypnotism? Yes, and it was a surprising fact to learn that hypnotism have be a certified medical method since 1958. The bad habit that was featured on todays article was about smoking. It dealt with the difficulty that fellow smokers who had a hard time kicking this habit away. How do we define habits? Habit are things that picked up and continously do it till it becomes a routine. It was something conscious that turn into something subconscious. In order to deal with bad habit such as smoking we need to deal it in two areas; the physical aspect and the subcontious aspect. The physical aspect would be the dependancy of nicotine and the subcontious aspect was to understand why we started smoking in the first place and how to find a relatively similar method in order to complement that action and to stop the habit all together. It seems that the latter is most difficult and that explains why some people return back to smoking after a day of stopping from it. In the end, it all depends on yourself whether you want to kick that habit or not.

It pretty interesting to find out why each one of us have habits on our own which we find it so difficult to stop from doing it. For me, it would be laziness. Looking at this holiday, the habits seems to speak for itself. Everyday, I would wake up around 10am, have breakfast, spend the next 1 and a half hour reading newspaper, having lunch, seeing TV, sleeping, seeing TV, dinner, seeing TV and sleeping. It seem like something relaxing to do, something that I am waiting to do ever since coming home for holiday. However, it seems pretty unproductive where the days just passes by so quickly and at the end of they day, I asked myself what I have achieved. Nothing. This is what I call a bad habit. Something my parents are constantly annoyed and have always been asking me to get a part time job rather than staying at home and wasting my time. Most of the time, I distest that idea but it seem pretty true when I sat down and wrote it out, what have I achieved throughout the day? Zero. Elek. Kosong. Is this really what it measn about holiday or should I be doing something beneficial rather than hanging around doing nothing? I sit and wonder and I realise there are many things to be done but I am hesitant in carrying it out. Things like clearing out my stuff I brought back after shifting, rearranging my room, applying for my industrial training, researching on my Final Year Project, learning some web skills that maybe useful for my industrial training and reading the Bible. The list is endless but what I am doing. Nothing. Its kind sad to realise it while writing this out. I guess I need to kick myself in the butt and get myself moving and settling all this stuff that are in the list and not making the list even longer with unfinish business.

Starting Young

This was a really interesting article that feature young people who were already making a mark and owning a business at a very young age. All of them were in their early 20's and were already having dot com companies, a graphic company, a tattoo shop, a record label and several restaurant. As I read, I realised that most of them were not high achievers. Some already graduated with a degree in hand, some didn't even complete their degree. It seems to show that all of them had discovered a niche that they were proud to be involved in and it wasn't about the grades that had but the talent they have which they have use it to their advantage. Initially, many of them faced alot of discouragement especially with their parents who viewed it as uncertainty and obtaining a degree seem to look more stable. Others were supportive of their child's venture and supported them financially. In the end, their initiative paid off and their family began to accept their new endeavour after realising that it was profitable.

It was pretty interesting to acknowledge that money seem to be the key to survival. As in, what we do is mainly for sake of money. Parents seem to disagree when things are uncertain and a piece of paper or a certificate as some may call it seem to provide something we hold on for security. It always seems like a paper would bring you far in life and that that single paper is able to make you millions where life would be easy and comfortable with all the riches we possess. Is this how humans view life is? Is money the thing we life for to make it us succesful in life? I agree to the importance of money and how money is the only way we have roof over our heads, food on the table and clothes to keep us warm. It seems like the world revolve around money alone. People are attracted to us when we have money but despised of us when we do not have them. The rich are adored, the poor are neglected. Is this how we view humanity as? Looking at this fact, I can help to say that I am in the middle of the money issue where we commit ourselves to. My parents are very concerned with the issue of money nowadays especially when my younger sister will be going to university soon and that would mean more money to be spend. I understand their struggle and realised that I need to save as much as possible so that my sister can have an education. Though, with loan and support coming from my uncle in terms of my education, my parents are still worried about it. They have been constantly asking me not to go out so much and giving me a figure of the amount of money that I would be wasting away when I stepped out of the house which may be incurred through spending, parking and petrol. It was better for me to stay at home as a hope to spend less. One of the reason why I decided to stay at home and not visit places was because of this. Guilt seem to surround me everytime I am out. Is this how it should be? It seems a rather drastic act to take and sometimes i feel frustrated over the issue of money though in my life, I am not the type who spend much. Most of my expenditure would be going places or having a meal. Besides that, I feel I am consider pretty meagre in my spending, as compared with friends that I have. Money alwasy seem to be an issue in life. Has it grip us to the fact that we became so dependable on it to survive? I think we have subconsciously without realising that life is far more than money alone.

Ideas of My Own

As I read all this little interesting stories of people my age succeeding and having companies or restaurant of their own, I can't help to think about plans which I have in the future. I can say that sometimes i dream of doing many things. One of them is to set up a restaurant. As I was watching Discovery Travel and Adventure on Celebrity Restaurant, I can't help to imagine a restaurant of my own of somewhat similar. I always enjoyed the combination of interior and food merge together to present a perfect ambience. I guess when you dream of starting your own restaurant, you would immediately think of what makes your restaurant different from the other restaurant around. As I walk around especially in shopping malls, I have always a habit of observaing eateries. It was nice to observe the way the restaurants makes an impression through its deco to the throng of people that passes by and the myriads of foods it served that cause people to merely stop by to see what is on the menu. In my time observation, I realise a lack of eateries which served Malaysian food. What do I mean by that? I know that there are many restaurant that served Malay, Indian, Chinese and Western cuisine but yet to find a place that combines the flavours of all this varieties of food into a signature dish called Malaysian. It is certainly a blessing to live in a land called Malaysia where the multi-racial citizen all present a respective type of cuisine by itself. How each flavour is disticnt which differentiate them all together. So, what do I want to be serve in my restaurant? I would like to see a mixture of taste of Malay, Indian and Chinese, prepared in a Peranakan way, presented in a Western setting.

Why a mixture of Malay, Indian and Chinese?
To resemble the diversity of our culture and merge of difference in preparing a menu of cuisine that would combine us all.

Why Peranakan?
Been brought up feasting on Peranakan cuisine as my grandma is a Nyonya herself, I found out that the preparation of Peranakan food is fine and detail. This adds up to the painstaking task of producing a simple meal which brings out a total different flavour to even the simplest of food. As my grandma said, turning a poor man dish into a royal taste.

Why Western?
I have always admired the way Western cuisine in particular French dishes that served in a very neat and creative way. However, its frustrating to see it in a small serving laid out on a big plate with decoration at the sides. I would tend to change it into having proportional serving with a medium scaled plate to serve it in.

Other thoughts were to have cuisine served on a rather small portion for those who are going light on the stomach that is somewhat similar to dim sum or sushi for that matter. Besides that, it be pretty cool to take advantage on the myriads of desserts and cakes or should i say kuih we Malaysian that I believed can be much more appertising than the typical cakes or sweets the English served.

This are just thoughts or idea which may or may not materialised depending on the level of seriousness i take upon it. Other thoughts of restaurant would be to make a restaurant not a restaurant but to incorporate other facilities that would make a restaurant not a place only to eat but to meet up for meeting, social gathering, cheap accomadation for passing travellers or even a place where up and coming musicians will be able to showcase their talents. Sounds more like a hotel to me. It does minus the grandour and frills. More down to earth that would appeal mainly to the medium-level people in society. Besides that, I have even thoughts of setting up hawker joints that maintain the hawker like atmosphere where the food is good and cheap minus the rubbish and rats that may be a common site to many when it comes to hawker. At the same point, allowing flea market to run in between this hawkers stalls where anyone is able to ply their trades or sell things that they didnt need much. Seems like a pasar malam to me. True, so guess this idea need to be worked on its differences.

Malaysian Idol

It seems that reality shows and showbusiness seem to come hand in hand. Pop Idol seem to reap success. American Idol seem to garner a cult following. Well, in no time Malaysian will be glued on their monitor set just to find out who will qualify and become the very first Malaysian Idol. I had thoughts of joining in the beginning. Just a crazy idea of just joiningfor the fun of it since it was a chance of a lifetime being able to go for an audition and belt out a favourite a number. It be cool having to go throught what other have gone through in hope of making it big. Savouring the whole experience and not expecting to win at all. Well, guess that is one of the many favourite reasons i find many giving as they prepare to enter this type of talent search. I have to admit that I too would give a similar reason. However, I thought about it and decided to forfeit that idea, realising that it would be adding to another list of distraction that may cause me to loose focus on what I am doing right now. Besides that, it be a major setback for me if I do make it through the preliminary rounds. Not that I am all that good and believe I have what it takes to make it big. But I am thinking of the reality side of it. What if I make an impression which I never thought I would? What would be of me going through the preliminaries and making it to the final 10? What will I do with my studies, my involvement in church and CF, my friends? Would I leave it all and pursue a life of riches and being in the public eye?

There is so much things to consider when you go into a talent quest like this and sometimes many people fail to see where it would lead them too. Yes, it is fun to join for the fun of it. I would be tempted to but will i loose my focus in the end which would be studying for a degree in engineering which would be over in a year time? I think I would and I rather not risk taking that step although it be a small step. However, a small step can bring us far. Sometimes even further from what we can imagine or think of that we find ourselves lost in the end now knowing why we are here. If i really do want to be famous or to experience and savour the life as a singer, I would have been a singer at the very beginning and not get myself studying for a degree which I would forfeit and waste RM60,000 for that where the money could be gone to good used for something else. Guess, sometimes all the fame and glamour clouds our mind that we sometimes fail to consider all of this. Is this about myself or is this about others? Am I sacrificing myself or others who have gone along way in putting me through what I have gone through? This clearly shows to me personally how easily we are tempted that we loose focus on what we have in hands and try our very best to reach for other thing even before we are done with what we have. For those who are considering decisions in life, be it auditioning for Malaysian Idol or stopping school to earn big bucks, always make sure we do not forget to consider the people around us as in the end its not about us, but our decision may affect others as well. For those who really have a gift and realise that this gift should be out into good use and not wasted, pray before making that big step and if u feel the peace in your heart and that the people in general are alright with it, do not fear to move on. The important thing is not to loose focus and take things one step at a time. Be ambitious and at the same time, be modest in your ways as well.

Accountability

Well, I guess some people do read my blog and I thank you for reading my little thoughts. I always wrote my blog personally for myself in particular, mainly to jot down my thoughts and what I have gone through so as to reflect it a year later. I realised that whenever I write my blog, I am somewhat accountable to those who read them. So if you have any thoughts on your own or feel that my thoughts may be somewhat loosing direction or going sideways, do leave me a comment for me to ponder.

A Casual Night Out With Fellow Friends

At around 10pm, I had an appointment with Terry and Lena for supper. Terry message me in the afternoon of a meet up and decided to go along with it since I had promise Lena earlier to meet up after camp. We ended up at S2 although our initial plan to meet at RJ was cancelled as we found out it was close. Our meet was quite interesting as we began asking Lena how it was coming home to work as she was undergoing her industrial training at Semi ON in Senawang. She seem to be having a nice time at work, practically walking around and making her presence known by the people at Semi ON. Whats more surprising she gets paid to do it. It seems to be quite enjoyable working at home or whats more working at Semi ON. My mind began to consider about maybe making necessary arrangement to apply for my internship back in Seremban althought I had initially insisted on working somewhere closer to campus due to my involvement in CF and to be close to a certain someone, frankly speaking. However, the thought remains an option and will consider coming home to work. And if that happens, I would be making weekly trips down to Cyber on Tuesday to attend CF and see what is there that need attention. Besides that, it was nice just to catch up with Lena and also Terry. Can't wait to catch up with Lena's twin, Joanne when she return from U.S. Guess, there are one of the few girls back home which I like catching up with and there always a conversation to make when we meet up.

Thoughts that Needed to be Penned Down

My mind was constantly questioning, asking and seeking an answer after a supposedly short discussion that turn out to be longer than expected with that special someone. This was something I had wanted to talk to her about last week but wasn't able to speak it out when I met her. Maybe, I had a lost of words and didn't know how to address the issue due to distraction of talking about something else besides this. I felt kind of heart broken after that conversation. Not because that things couldnt work out yet between us, but because my expectation to start a relationship with that special someone seem to vanish. I had this notion before but thought that it would come to reality this time around. However, I realise that wasn't true. The question to take the relationship a step higher seem to leave a trail of questions that was hard to answer, both for me and her. I found that there seem to be so much doubt and uncertainty to start a relationship. Having to consider so many things that I feel pressured by all this factors. I realised that it isnt easy to start a relationship and it required far alot of consideration besides us but also considering the people around us such as parents friends and the people in general. Other consideration like studies and commitment to church and CF seem to add on to this pressure. So much consideration, yet not a single certainty.

I am trying not to give any pressure to her or to rush into a relationship if either one isn't ready to take the next step. Besides that, I was also reflecting at our relationship which had taken such a short time to developed into what it is now. Is this one of the reason why all this uncertainty was brought up? I am sometimes puzzled or just confuse where all of this will lead to. My greatest fear in this relationship is that this relationship will not work out. She seem to be someone whom i finally found that i could feel comfortable being with and I guess it is for her case as well. But, i may just be another someone who cares and likes her that crosses her path and maybe not be the One for her. She is one who is likable by many and that explains the many interest she gets from other guys besides myself. The thought scares me as at this moment the assurance I receive from this relationship seem to be questionable. Whether this is love or just another crush I have in life? I've even had thoughts of casually taking this relationship and treating her as my best friend rather than something more for now. This would result in less chats, less SMS, less phone calls, less misses and less thinking about her.

The thought of staying single for another year cross my mind again. Kissing dating goodbye seem to fit into that description. I feel that if it isn't the time for me to move into a relationship that I would take this time to improve myself in areas that I find that I lack in and the same moment prepare myself spiritually before going into a relationship. I found out that it so easy to loose one focus when the foundation isnt strong. There is so many temptation and distraction that may come my way that sometimes I'm unwary of. I seem to be ever more determined to prepare myself for marriage rather than courtship. I want to go into a relationship with a girl whom God has prepared for me that is ready for marriage. It sounds pretty awkward that I be thinking about marriage when I can't even decide on going into a relationship. However, I feel that it be right to move into a relationship when I am prepared to consider marriage. One of my friend mention that we should only say "I Love You" if we are prepared to ask her hand in marriage. I believe that it is so true that sometimes the phrase "I Love You" isn't taken seriously that causes many breakups to turn to Hate instead. I seem to agree that the phrase "I Love You" is an unofficial seal we give to someone we love truly that we see the future of being with that someone. It would be someone you are able to complement with and at the same time grow as individuals, working out the differences and weaknesses and able to become One.

I am praying about this and will take this holiday to seek Him for His direction. Seriously, I really am scared about this but at the same time is determined to seriously consider marriage if I decide to move into a relationship. The question is will she be the One for me? I hope so. I hope to see it come to pass because I truly like being around her and to be able to complement one another in many areas. Its hard to meet someone like that and at this point of time, I feel that she is the One. But feelings may deceived the human heart and all I can do now is lay it down at His feet. Will continue to pray for her and also pray that our friendship will continue to grow stronger and that we would build a strong foundation that would prepare us for marrige whether with one another or someone else that God has in store for us. As I conclude this thought, I would like sincerely thank you for your love, care and understanding that you have shown to me throughout this one year of getting to know you and I pray that God will continue to build you up to be the woman that you are made to be and that our friendship will continue to blossom and grow as we move into the next academic year. God bless!

Sending Off

It was going to be a very exciting day for me today. Exciting because activities that would be taking place before the rising of the sun to mark the new day. With a minimal amount of sleep, i was up at around 4 am. It was pretty strange to be waking up so early in the morning. The last time i remembered waking up this early was about 2 years ago when my family and I were preparing to make a trip down to Singapore for a visit there. The whole house was up and awake as we prepared to send my sister, Julia to the airport. My parents and I occupanied my sis and Mei Sin, who slept over the night before to to the airport as we bid farewell. Due to limited space in the car, my younger sis, Jessica had to stay back and take care the house, in other words to sleep back again. As we reached the departure at our beautiful KL International Airport, i spotted a group of people wearing the striking red of the Cyber Christmas T-shirt which became their official shirt as they travelled to Sibu, Sarawak. Though this trip was meant for Final Year Students, my sis decided to join in the bandwagon as she was looking forward to go to Sarawak for missions.

What is missions as some might ask? Well, missions means to travelled to another place on a volunteerily basis with the objective of helping the people there and also to help spread the message that we as Christian believe in. Many have ask me why I didn't decide to go along on this trip since I had always wanted to go on a local mission trip that would take me to the indigenious people which were located away from the city life we are so comfortably settled in. It is my desire but I wasnt really prepared yet to go to mission just yet. I would personally take mission as something rather serious and that involve being spiritually and physically prepared for the trip. Spiritual prepared to do battle where there are bound to be oppression that may hinder the work and also to physically prepared to endure the tough and strainous travel that require one to trek through undergrowth in the deep forest, travelling on speed boats on the rough currents of rivers to the deep villages and acclimatising to nature where bathing and doing "business" in the river would be a daily routine. This was natural some of the things that this group of people had to endure through the training in Malacca last week as they prepared themselves for this trip today.

One of the most interesting sight to see when i was at the airport was to see the luggages that they had to bring along for the trip alone. It was certainly up to each individuals to plan the things that they needed to bring for this trip. Some had bags that weight a tonne while some made you wonder how in the world were they going to go though 11 days of mission with such small luggages. It makes you curious to want to see what they had in their bags. I also had the priviledge to meet up some Malaccans who I hadnt seen for some time. It was nice bumping into Chern Wai and Alfrel and seeing Kameni, Janet, Grace, Josephine and Szu Li who were all pretty busy making sure that they had their stuff in place. The chattery Pastor Joanne was also there making sure that all are well as she accompanies the group on this trip. There were also some faithful seniors who woke up early and make their way here to send the group off namely Agnes, Brendan and Alvin Bong. It was good to see the support we give one another as fellow Cf'ers be it in Cyberjaya or Malacca, working people or fellow undergraduates. As they made their journey to Sibu, Sarawak, I wish them a pleasant journey and may the good Lord guide and protect them throughout their journey there. In prayers we will keep you in.



A Visit to the Hospital

I wasn't able to stay longer to help them take their group photo as they made their way to McD for probably breakfast before they depart as I had to rush back by 730am to fetch my grandpa to the hospital for his eye examination. Grandma followed along to accompany my grandpa. As they were going through the eye examination, I was going to the hospital for my regular checkup for my achne. Its been quite along time that I have been suffering from achne. Though it has been undercontrolled for the pass couple of years, the scars still remain and occasional breakout do occur. Its hard living with a scarred face for so long. Sometimes I envy those who have perfect flawless skin. I often questioned why my face had to suffer such cruel popups that would include a combination of pust and blood oozing out from very little pores of my skins and leaving a blemish on my skin. Occasionaly I do give up having to go through the whole process of making sure that my skin maintain oil free with constant washing and also smearing cream on my face with the hope that this popup do not occur once more. Amidst my effort, they seem to be ever popping out just like a seed sprouting out from the earth and breaking into a nice blossom. The difference is that mine will leave a scar instead.

My checkup this time didnt take as long as I would imagine as I was there early. It took around 2 and a half hours from registering to waiting to seeing the specialist and going to the pharmacy to obtain a large amount of medicine that would cost me a boom if i were to go for a private consultation. Visiting a public hospital required patience for relative cheap consultation of RM 5 only from specialist. However, this would mean sacrifice of a huge amount of time. For me, it was worth it as my previous visit to the private clinic didnt really make a difference to my condition except burn a hole in the wallet. My visit to the doctor didnt only include my achne alone but also some rashes i had developed on my knee cap and a recurrance of rash in my groin area. I pressume this could be the results of taking a plunge in the disgust pond during camp a week ago. The rashes were beginning to be more serious and it was causing an itch that in due time may be unbearable. I used to have sleepless nights because of the unbearable itch and was determined to try to resolve it as soon as possible before it became more serious.

In the midst of my consultation with Dr. Najeb, I was in the accompany of 5 medical students from IMU sitting and discussing about the patients conditions as they come in one by one. It was common to have them around and everytime it was a different set of students with different sets of personality. Armed with textbooks or notes in the hand, they were often questioned what kind of prognosis to give to the respective patients and what kinda of medicine to prescribe to improve their condition. However, I didnt have the passion to pursue this line of duty as being a doctor requires more than the thought of making millions but more of helping others who are in need. And looking at that, Ive always gave alot of respect to those who serve in public hospital where the pay may be less than working in the private hospital but the number of people you get to serve is so much more. Dr. Najeb check my condition under close curtain. I was asked whether I would allow the students to take a look at my condition or even allow the male medical student to observe, I declined that invitation out of embarasment due to showing my privates to an unknown person was pretty intimidating. On second thought, I would want to contribute and allow him to take a look so that when face with a similar situation, he was able to make the necessary prognosis that may help somoene else in the future with the similar condition as mine. With the neccesary I acquired after my visit today, I hope that this medicine will help improve the situation and at the same time I'm praying that His divine healing will hastened the recovering process. I realise that hygience is equally important and this may be why I'm suffering from all this skin allergies. Or maybe this is something hieraditary due to my family history of having sensitive skins.

One of my favourite past time is to observe people around me. As I waited for my turn to see the doctor and also to collect my medication, I took this oppurtunity to indulge on one of favourite past time. My target group this time seem to be focus to the little children there. I always had fascination for little children. It was merely the way the reacted to things which may seem so innocent and also their care free nature of not having to worry about so many things which we adults seem to do it quite naturally. One of encounters was a pair of twins who seems to having a ball to themselves by merely playing around with empty plastic bags. I guess they likened it like ballons floating around as they let them go and allow the wind to carry them away. They were going through the whole routine all over again. Such simple acts allowed them to be happy. Sometimes I do imagine what the world would be if all of us were to be child like in nature and not worry about anything. However, the other extreme would be nothing would be done if we were be care free like a child. Looking a child amazes me all the time then sometimes in life we need not worry so much and just take things as it is and enjoy the little things that we have. Maybe in this way we could learn to be happy and not complain all the times. Well, as the general statement made by many, humans are never satisfied with what they have.

After the visit to the hospital which took almost the whole morning, I went out with lunch with my grandparents where they decided to foot the bill althought I had already taken out money to pay for it. I decided to turn down my grandparents invitation to sit at their house after fetching them back as I wanted to return home to take a nice bath before going to bed to get the much anticipated sleep I need. Well, the wanting was so great that I ended up sleeping for 4 hours and was awaken by my mom's shout to wake me up.

It's been almost a week since i last post my thoughts or things that ive been through. not that i didnt want to or allowed laziness to crip in but because it was quite a hectic week for me ever since my last paper last thurs. dont get me wrong, i aint preparing myself for the next semester but busy with meetings and also a camp to go to. it was really good to be free from exams and once again anticipating the holidays with full of excitement. this is some of things that i have been busy getting myself indulge in.

Finals Finale

It was really a joy to have my last paper of the sem to be finally over. Advanced Computer Archicture was quite okay looking at the question having been taken from pass year. Kinda regretted for forgetting one diagram which i mistakenly took as something complex but found out that it really simple. 10 marks gone down the drain which would inevitably make a difference in my grades for an A. However, I'm quite satisfied that everything was okay and am just wishing that everything will be well. It was also a day of celebration for my sister who finally ended her marathon of 4 papers consecutively. I could imagine the strain to go through a marathon and decided to bring her out somewhere that night just to chill out. But before i made plans for the night, i had the opportunity to have lunch with "The Boys".

Boys Day Out

The boys, i called them are a group of guys (obviously!) that i hang out much and have been close to during the pass year at uni. Although my place of stay may be different from them and we hardly meet up compared to last time when we were staying in campus, the bond is still there and it was always something refreshing to meet up with them. I was brought to a place in Serdang which sold pretty cheap "chap fan". It was something unbelievable, so i decided to prove that statement right. And boy, were they right. Five dishes and it only cost me RM3.20. If i had taken a similar portion back in campus, it would be more than RM5. Though i wouldnt have much opportunity to come here compared to my frens due to the distance here from campus, it was certainly a good to eat something which is cheap, nice and Chinese. After lunch, i decided to hangout the Boys crib down at Putra Permai and just check out what is new. Nothin relatively new just that one of the housemates who used to stayed at the attic had shifted out and i managed to meet with Fui's cousin who is bunking at his place temporarily before he takes his final paper and officially can call himself a graduate from UNITEN. I had also a preview of a few video clips of a Taiwanese show, which was kinda similar to Super Sunday. Fui was showing me a couple of vids that showed a few pretty girls in which every episode, 5 girls will run for a competition that had a theme each. Other that that, i almost puik when he showed me an episode that showed a family who recycle their urine. Yes, urine. They practically use their urine to drink, make popcicle, bathe, wash face and even for medicine. They had bottles of urine which they had kep for almost 10 years. I was beginning to feel really sick seeing this. It was interesting to see how people go all the way to prove that they are different than others. What a disgusting things to prove their difference.

A Visit from Dusty

It was good to see Dusty once again. He had told me his coming a few weeks back on YM and that i was the third person to know of his coming. Fortunately, he came on the day i finish my exam and had time to entertain him. It was surpise to see him rather thin and was even more surprised that he was going on a diet. Guess, it comes a time when you start to be more concern on your outward appearance due to certain intentions. I wonder what. He didnt follow me with my sis to Mid Valley that night as he wanted to meet some people since he was in campus. After coming back, i decided to bring him to Cyberia to meet some people before he left back home. Although, it was pretty a bad timing and some of them still had exam to endure the following day and just brought him to say a quick hi and bye. Besides bringing him around Cyberia with my sis, i had the opportunity to meet two Koreans where one of them he met at KLIA and who was on his way back to campus. It was nice knowing both of them and felt they were really friendly. One i had met before through a fren and it was surprisingly to see how small the world is as each of us are connected in one way or another. Got their YM id's and hope to be able to call them up for dinner someday before they leave in September. I guess i felt at that point of time i needed to pay more attention to the international student and show more hospitality to them as many of them felt kinda left out in one way or another. That is kinda surprising to me eventhough Malaysian are known for their hospitality. Guess that statement was made on a minority of people where in fact in general, Malaysian are still close minded and tend to stick with their own race so to speak. It takes a step of kindness to make a difference in one's life.

The Great Workout

It was time of the year where in campus students start to pack all their belongings and shift them out only to return in 3 weeks time in a similar process of shifting back. It was seriously a tiring experience, bringing down tonnes of stuff we have in our rooms, both my sis and I. it was pretty surprising to see the many stuff we have that we even didnt even know. Like some may say, what we have is about 3 times of what we see. Fortunately, I manage to pack some stuff and shift it out the week before and that already filled the whole car. Me and my sis had to pack some stuff to be taken to Cyberia to be stored as we didnt need to bring it back home and shift it back again. The remaining items were stuffed in the car and brought back home. It was seriously a painstaking process but also one which tested my stamina and endurance, and i reliased how weak i was. My hands were shaking after much carrying and it proved to me that i really had weak arms. Time to get back on some stamina regime and start training for the next big move.

Committee Planning and Meeting

Saturday and Sunday were the two days that we as committees of the CF had to sacrifice so that we could gather and plan for our theme of the year and per sem and what to be done during the first semester. It was seriously an interesting meeting as it was filled with alot of exchanges of ideas that was kinda tense at some point due to tiredness and the unability to reach to a conclusion due to the inability to understand the whole situation all together and go in one accord with one another. I found out during the meeting as i was preparing the concerns of the CF, that most of this concerns had to do with us as individuals and whether we could reflect upon ourselves and recognise that we are apart of the CF and that this are some concerns which relate to us and whether we could take a step and change ourselves first before even speaking about it. Having been in the committee for almost 3 years already, ive notice that many of us tend to speak alot but fail to act upon what we speak. it was a scary thought as i listed down all the concerns and decided at the very end to not speak about the concerns but let the rest know that solving this problems and concerns, we need to check ourselves first. Problems will always be there unless we recognise it as individuals and take a step to change. If not this problems will still be there in years to come and it will merge into the CF and turn into a culture that may break the CF up. I guess alot of this concern brought us all to realise that our current goal is to build the relationship within the CF before we start to reach out. I hope to see that CF will return back to its purpose of existence that we exist as a fellowship and not a church and also to give opportunity to others and to build up new leaders as we move on. As we know, CF doesnt revolve around one person or one group. it revolves around each and every member of the CF. I really hope and pray that we could continue to grow not in numbers alone but grow together and build each of the members up so that we are prepared as individuals for our ministry to the people outside the CF.


It hard to imagine myself spending a night over a girl's house. Not because i wanted to but because i was really tired, due to shifting her stuff to her new place of stay and also from the meeting that i just had. It was something i decided on at the very last minute althought i had made plans to stay over at a friend's place at Cyberia. It would feel odd for other to think that i stayed over and i myself feel funny as well. I will make it a point the next time to return and bunk at someone else place rather than stay over. it would be more better than to cause people to question about my action and allow speculation to arise.

IF Camp

We had to set out early on Monday morning to the campsite. An entourage of almost 10 cars made that trip to the land of Broga which is situated after Kajang town, the place famous for its satay. It was certainly interesting to see cars going for camp rather than a bus, which we would normally take to camps. It does shows how blessed the CF is when most of us have cars to travel with. Unlike the Malaccans, they had to made their way to Broga on the bus. It was quite a small scale camp as many people couldnt make it especially those who were going for mission trip to Sarawak as they had their training in Malacca on the same day as well. The camp committees were expecting about 120 people to come but in the end only less than half turn up. It was kinda disappointing to think about the number, but overal the camp was quite good minus frankly, the inorganised planning before the camp especially about the transportation which was settled at the very last minute. In the end, i thank God that everything work out well and that everyone had a wonderful time during the whole camp. Seriously, this had been the most funniest camp i ever been, thanks to the new bunch of alpha people who would be staying back in malacca who were so hilarious and outgoing that it make the camps so much more fun. I was happy to see this people staying back in malacca instead of comin to cyberjaya. I guess it would be much more beneficial for them to stay back and help out the malacca CF where many have left to come to cyber. Besides that, it was also a tiring camp as we had so many activities which tested our stamina as well as our fear. I was pushed to thepoint where i had to conquer my fear of jumping of the ledge for the flying fox. I took quite along time decide to jump of the ledge, something i fear most, height and speed. But at the very end i decided to give it a shot and realised it wasnt that fast anyway. Other than that, we had fun time building a raft from bamboo and plastic barrels and racing it in a disgust pond which was actually filled with sewage water, BOM the BOX; a similar thing to capture the flag except that we had to bom the box 5 times to finish the task that were listed out in the box, night treasure hunt and also a battle of the cheers which included a group representing Malay, Red Indians, Cowboys and Chinese. Pastor Victor also delivered quite an interesting message although at certain point i was kinda lost due to his jokes that sometimes deviate from the main point of his topic. Overall, it was a fun time and i hope to be able to make it for my next IF camp which would be my final one. Hope that Mission Trip doenst get in the way.

A Night Out With Fellow Serembanians

After recuperating from a tiring camp, i had the opportunity to meet up with fellow ex classmates, mostly from UNITEN for a session of bowling. It was good to meet up with them and knowing that Vishnu and Soon Keong will be graduating and moving on in life. Pretty fast to imagine that all of this had taken about 5 years already and that all of us were going to start working soon. Mine will be in a years time. Time really does flies. And it does when i found out that my last session of bowling was 4 years ago. Althought, I started out pretty well but it ended with me only managing 95 points beaten by both Soon Keong and Yew Cheong who both scored above 100 points. Prince also apart of the 5 man bowling tournament. It was simply nice to realise some balls down the alley into the pins. Should practice more to get my strike on my next visit there. it was also surprising to see many people there even on a weekday and we had to wait about an hour for our turn. it comes to show that seremban isnt a dead town as before.

After bowling, i met up with Terry for a cup of drink and roti canai. It was pretty surprising to have him call me out for yam char, cuz he seldom does that in all my years of knowing him. But, i realise that he had wanted to talk about something. It was a good chat, not the usual chat where we normally crap most of the time but something serious considering both of us knowing about one another situations. I was happy for him coming up to me and letting me some concerns in his hearts. Hearing him out telling about his concerns for me and also what is going through was really refreshing. I guess first of all i had to thank blog for bridging us closer to one another and letting each other know wat we are actually going through. it was good to be accountable to somoene im close with and i told him to let me know of his concerns about me as i didnt mind people coming up to me and letting me things i sometimes myself fail to see. I had known Terry since Form 4 and enjoyed my friendship with him all this years. Though we have been friends for so long, i would say that we have been close with one another this academic year. Close as in we are open with one another and i really enjoy people who are open about their life. Though, Terry and me may differ in characteristics, me being more of the extrovert and him being more introvert. However, knowing each other i felt that we could also be extrovert and introvert in our our different ways depending on situations as well. I would say for now that he is my closest guy friend i have, sometimes i think i can call him my best friend. Thank you for always being there for me when i needed you and thanks for all friendship that we had so far. I promise that ill wont forget you or any of my other close frens which i have, even when i decide to go into a relationship in time to come. I always believe that even when you have a girlfriend, friendship with others will continue and grow. You have my word on this. I pledge elligence to friendship.

Reflecting

A week has pass already and i have two more weeks to look at. What am i goin to do, I wonder? First of all, i would like to take this time to ponder and reflect on what i am going through, mainly about preparing myself to go into a relationship and at the same time building upon the foundation of a solid spritual walk and pushing myself to have a discipline and routine spiritual life so that i may learn from Him and to grow closer to Him so that i may prepared myself for things to come be it relationship or moving on with life and preparing for the working world and also finding out my gift and using it for His glory. The other one would be to prepare resumes to be send out and also to discuss with Terry about our Final Year Project. I hope to not waste my holidays wasting my time at home sleeping and watching TV but making the full use of it all. Only determination and desire will bring to accomplishing my goals for this holiday. Guess, i better start writing it down and have a checklist to make sure i do it and not talk about it. May God lead me and guide me.

The End

With one chapter to go in "Not Even A Hint", i couldnt wait to finish reading it just before i went to bed last night. I had turn in early the night before due to my unability to concentrate on what i was reading. Instead of merely idling around, i decided to rest early but before i could, i needed just to end my day with a last helping of Not Even A Hint. It has been a very fruitful reading thus far. Taking time to read during this exam period in some sense spurred my desire to begin reading again. The last i could remember picking up a book to read it entirely was a few years ago. My desire to read had began to die away except the occasional readings of the newspapers or articles that i come across either in the printed form or throught the internet. I had lost my passion to sit and read and merely fed my reading habits with short reading which i find much more interesting. Anyway, i was delighted to have finish reading "Not Even A Hint" and cant wait to have another helping before i continue back on left-behind book which i started long time ago "Courageous Leadership" by Bill Hybels.

My reading of "Not Even A Hint" ended with Chapter 10 : Holiness Is A Harvest - How Can I Sow to the Spirit? I can say for sure it was a very nice way to end it by challenging us to continue to be holy in our ways and draw close to Him. Although i started reading with an intention to find ways to help me out of my lust, i found out in the end it was a reminder of a simple truth which was to draw close to Him. It darn upon me that althought this book addresses lust but the crust of this book wasnt lust at all. It was purely coming back to my First Love. To contiously commune in Him through prayer and the reading of the Word. Two very basic and clear actions that we sometimes that for granted of. This book did address lust but it also could be used to address the sins in our hearts be it lust, adultery, backstabbing or even impurities that we keep within us that draw us away from Him. I realise that our struggles are actually a means of showing us how far away we are from Him. It shows that the reason we are caught in sin is because we have grown distance from Him which cause us to dwell into sin. As the author mention, it is either we sow of the grounds of righteouness or the grounds of sin. If we intend to face our struggles and break away from sin, we should stop sowing in the grounds of sin and began sowing in the grounds of righteousness.

It truly made me wonder and realise that i have neglected my faith in some aspect and lost my passion of getting to know my Saviour or even my faith as a Christian. Have i forgotten? I guess i have. Forgetting to a point that i began to dwelt in sin secretly although my appearance as a "Christian" cause me to put up a mask that hid my true self from others around me. I feel so ashamed and guilty of my actions. Guilt would not cause me to dwell in it further but to realise that my direction has swivered away from the path that He has laid for me, His plans and His future for my life. Having knowledge is one thing, taking action to rectify that realisation takes a discipline and determination to come back to Him.

Looking at my current situation of pursuing a relationship, i intend to change before i take the next step in bringing that relationship to another level. It is best to settle my struggles before entering into a relationship less it turns sour and problems may arise due to my unability to change.

A Thought On Relationship

I had a very good conversation last night while studying with one of my "girlfriend". Girlfriends? Yes, girlfriends! Girls whom i had grown close to in the pass years mainly through chats and to be able to share my thoughts and life freely with them which in a way has blessed me abundantly. Some of this girls i would say I had considered before but felt that it was better to be friends than to pursue as lovers. There is only a handful of them and looking at it, i can say for sure i have also a handful of people whom i can call as close. This are the people whom i am comfortable with sharing and mainly i am myself most of the time when im with them. No pressures, no expectations, just pure openess and friendship. Come to think of it, most of those i am close with aren't from the CF. My group of close friends are countable and are equal in belief, Christians and non-Christians. I have alwasy this thought to be relevant and not be close minded to think that close friends are limited to people of the same belief. Besides, this group of close friends are people whom i feel are who they are rather than being who they think they should be. I realise that is why most of them arent from the CF. Its pretty ackward as i speak that even people of the same belief do put up a variety of masks which sometimes i find it hard knowing who they really are.

I was pretty excited when one of my "girlfriends" tolme that she had just started a relationship with a guy. Actually the news came abit earlier than expected as her initial plan was to tell him on his birthday which was 2 days away. I was glad that i was inform and felt happy that she had finally found her One. After 3 years of friendship and him being his first, i would say it was an ideal decision to make. A decision that was based on friendship first and slowly progress to another higher level. At that point of time, i began to reflect on my relationship and my principles on it. I feel ashamed that i had not lived up to my principles. Principles that i hold so strongly but failed to meet it when faced with it.

I have gotten to know a girl who i believe had progress a little too fast. Maybe the constant chats had allowed us to got to know each other better and i felt that i would want to bring it to another level. At one time i do admit me being afraid of the pace that i was in and decided to have a talk with her and see how we can slow it down a little. I prayed about it alot, hoping that He would show me His way. And i believe it is so as my options had been cut down to one and sharing it with her seem to show some similiarities as well. its hard to know whether it is His will but having the peace in my heart and also the joy and being comfortable of being myself when im with her strengthened my decision. I am still praying. Praying for both of us that we would equip ourselves and when the time is right for us to start it of, it was because of His grace and not because of our effort alone. So I'm leaving this thought aside at the moment and want to concentrate on my last paper before thinking about it. At the mean time, i will continue to pray fervantly and seek His will for my life. Thanks for reminding me, gal!

Not Even A Hint (continuation)

Getting pretty excited where this book is bringing to in terms of understanding what lust is all about. "Half A Poison Pill Won't Kill You - How do I cope with the temptations of Media?" spoke mainly on how to abstain from the media that contain lustful things completely and not give in to it eventhought the movie or a particular series seems to be popular amoing viewers or had garnered tonnes of awards. Accountability seem to be the crust of "Lone Rangers are Dead Rangers - Why Is Accoutability So Important?". Joshua Harris stressed that it is important to have someone you are accountable to if you want to conquer lust. It should be someone from the same sex, guy to guy and girl to girl. What kind of person should we find? Well, first of all we should look for someone who fears God and who take his word seriously. Being comfortable with the person shouldnt be one of ur criteria but find somoene who will make you uncomfortable with your sin. As in, that person will remind continously and make you feel guilty about wat you have done. Guilt isnt all that bad. It makes u realise that what you do, in this case lust is bad and should be put an end to it. This person should be somoene who is strong in areas that you are weak in. God's word seem to be best solution mention in" The Sword of the Spirit - How Can the Truth Help Me Defeat the Lies?" in defeating lust. Memorizing and using them when met with temptation lust is a good way to defend yourself from sinning. I still have a chapter left in my reading and will make my conclusion in my next post. Im wanting to have a second reading less i forget and only read for the sake of reading.

A Second Visit to the Land of Creativity

I had the oppurtunity today to visit our beloved neighbout campus, Lim Kok Wing University College of Creative and Technology (LUCT). Terry had invited me together with Mathan, mainly to bring our beloved to visit this unique campus. Unique? Yes, unique with its myriad of people with different and interesting outlooks where they seem to project apart of themselves throught their dressing and character. It was also a norm to see student puffing away just as they enter their classes. Girls with buds in their hands seem to project coolness but i totally disagree with the self projection. Ive always dislike people who try to look cool with a stick in their hand not knowing that looking cool pays a dear price. Cant really imagine having filt and carbon entering my body. How can they i wonder???

We had the oppurtunity to have lunch at their open concept food court that had caterers from Eden as well as D' Tandoor. The latter one seems to be a new caterer trying to ply their trade in this little community of creative buff. Sitting around and just looking around seem to be an interesting thing to do as we gubbled down our lunch. I manage to spot a girl whom i caught my attention the last time i was here. Funny being able to spot someone for the second time and remembering who she is. I kinda have this things to be captivated by girls who look cool. How would i describe cool? Guess everyone have their own definition of coolness. For me, coolness is mainly how they carry themselves people feeling at ease and able to interate with both girl and boy, regarless of race or religion. Besides that, most of this cool girls seem to spot short hairs that may pass them as tomboys for most of them. Im not so sure why am i captivated by tomboys, but i guess they seem different to me. Other interesting character is a chinese girl who seem to look like a double of Stephanie Sun. Tall, slim, short hair, pearky nose with big eyes and a sweet smile. Besides that, there was an african guy who was like a Lenny Kravitz wannabe. Others were quite general, slim and curvature body girls, short skirts, smokin girls, spaggheti strap and even a girl who had the word HONEY written on her bum. Now, you see why there is a myriad of characters down at LUCT. i also manage to recognise one girl whom ive seen in LUCT advertisement in newspaper. A blonde lady. Surprising she was a staff there and boy was she pretty. My friend on the other hand was kinda taken aback to see her much bustier than normal girls than seem to leave him speechless for a moment. I tried to refrain myself from looking at it althought i pass her althought i had a quick glance and realise what my friend had said. Guess, reading a book on lust did gave me a guilty conscience all the more.

I took some pics form my last visit there. I hope you do not get surprised by it but this is a little sneak preview of the so called Creative Hub of Malaysia.



Better to be Vegetable than to Die

It was rather an interesting thought today, something that i never thought about it before. I had dinner with Lydia, Joanne, Nadia, sis and Kelvin today at HB1 indulging in our favourite pasta shop and we sort of came to the topic of committing suicide. In the Christian context, suicides will normally be thrown into the pits of fire. But what if you try to commit suicide but failed to die, leaving you a vegetable? Its actually another chance in life given to you. However, your penalty is to remain a vegetable for life but with a choice to repent the sins that you have made. So is it that bad to be a vegetable? Think about it