Eyes Wide Shut

Marriage. A convenant we keep until the very day we die. A commitment towards a person we have come to love.

I like their company. Very open kinda guys who would be able to carry any conversation. Like any typical machas. Despite the difference in age, I feel very comfortable like they were peers. They were married. Have a family.

I felt rather uncomfortable when they were checking out other woman. Commenting of woman who came in and out of the chap fan shop in a rather crude manner. It felt funny.

I knew they were married.
I thought they will keep their eyes only for their wife.
I expected them to move on with life with a new perspective in life.

Men. A ravaging beast seeking to devour the next victim. At that point of time, I felt like a woman. How to have eyes run all over you. It would indeed be a rather uncomfortable feeling. Felt like the movie "100 girls" when the guys became a woman for a week and felt how it was to be a woman. It is sick but thats men. A lustful beast.

Although it felt uncomfortable, I knew at least I would not take that path. I promise that I would keep my eyes only to the one I had come to love, the one I would start a relationship and hopefully progress to spend my entire life with her. It is not easy being a men with lustful desires but I believe if we try hard enough and seek His help, we can go through life loving the one we love truly in heart, soul and mind. I have yet to find her but I know she is out there. True love waits and I hope when I do meet her, I can have the courage to tell her my true feelings. An area I need His help.

To those who are in a relationship or married, love her with all your heart and let not your eyes wander. Deception are always pretty, it gets ugly when it starts to eat you from the inside and destroy what love is. I am writing this hoping to remind myself then even before I meet her, I can keep my eyes for her.