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3 February 2004

The clock struck 7.30am. I looked at it shockingly and quickly jumped of the bed with my pyjamas into a shirt and shorts and raced down the stairs to the little hut that was nearby. I was late again for Morning Glory. Even in my lateness, I was able to join the guys as they were praying and got my name mention in the prayer as well. In another unrelated incident, spotted a pair of snails bonding together passionately. I come to realise now why there were so many snails around MMU. It was a daily activity for them. Production house.

It was rather a relaxing day for me today as classes was few and it gave me more time to finish studying the paper that I was due to sit the following. Coupled with an assignment that was due on Thursday which happened to be a public holiday (Thaipusam), I was beginning to worry about having to accomplish both of this task that were before me. Though, it was worrying I decided to continue with what I was doing and worry about the other thing later less I get distracted and not do either.

Blessed

I felt really blessed at one moment today. I wasn’t sure that thought came to me but I was indeed blessed or should I say love. Thoughts after thoughts came to me while I was studying of how I was so blessed with so much yet I realised most of this blessing I didn’t deserve one bit. Things that weren’t mine but I get to enjoy, people that I met that were so nice to me but I sometimes neglect. So much blessing, so little appreciation. I dropped my pen and beginning to say a word of thanksgiving to Him who has always love me and taken care of me despite failing Him numerous and countless times. I began to realise that many things that I ask of Him, He gave graciously. Sometimes He didn’t and I wonder why. I guess He knew what to give and what not give, what I need and what I do not need. It daunt upon me as well that I shouldn’t be fearful of asking anything from God because I know that He will provide.

“Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” Matt 7:7-8

What I should be fearful is God taking away what He has given. What do I do to retain this blessings? Obedience. God has a plan for each and everyone of us. A road laid out for each and everyone of us that all we need to do is just to walk that road and obey the road signs that placed vividly for us to see so as to direct us to where He wants us to go. Many of the time we don’t follow this road that He has built. We don’t look at the signs that are placed before us. Rebelliousness takes over. Pride takes over. Self takes over. This is when we build our own roads, build our own signs to a destination that we want to go. In the end, we are lost out in an open, deserted place where no one can find us except God himself. I was convicted at that point that God was showing me and also bringing and moulding to be the man He wants me to be. I personally had many dreams, many visions that He had imparted to me. The question is whether I would see this dreams, this visions come to reality depends solely on my obedience to the One who loves me dearly.

Family Matters

Evening came and it was time for CF. I had to be earlier as we would normally have a committee prayer before the CF starts. Today’s committee prayer would see a mixture of incoming and outgoing committees. We had a time of sharing of what was it like to be in the committees for the outgoing committees and also what would be the challenges that the incoming committee would face. It would be the first CF after for everyone after coming back from a week or should I say more than a week of holiday. Rachel Ann Thong’s mom and dad came to visit us and brought to us a message on “Family Thang”. I couldn’t help to be inspire by the message which was short and simple yet it spoke to many of our hearts as it was something that we could relate with, Family. I couldn’t help visualising my own family. My parents are both wonderful people who take care for the three children in the family. They have always been there to nurse us when we are sick and advice us when we make our mistakes. Yet, at times I often take them for granted. I can’t be confident enough to say that our family are close. I would rather say that we are an OK family. We do speak most of the times but we do not venture in personal issues. I have always wondered why I couldn’t tell them just about anything as compared to my other friends. Maybe, I am scared. Scared that what I do may cause them to worry or be upset. The notion of speaking to them does come at times and I hope that I will be able to speak to them as often as possible even sharing things that are personal. One statement Mrs. Mary Ann Thong said reminded me what my dad used to say especially when I was always out of the house.

“Don’t treat your house like hotel where you step in, have a bath, go to sleep and step out again.”

There are times we get so bored by staying at home that we venture outside to find things to do although in actually fact there are loads of things to do right inside the house. I realise that my parents always want me and my sister to be at home when we return every weekend. They want to know that we are safe at home and also to spend time with the family even if it means doing nothing. It does make sense come to think of it and I think I beginning to realise that are a lot of things that my parents used to say does make a lot of sense now compared to the time when I first heard it. Maybe its easier to listen to others other that those who are close to you, like your parents.